In many ways, we all have had opportunities to be leaders. We may be a big shot quarterback, a finance wiz on Wall Street, or closer to Earth, the captain of an athletic team,  or even the group leader of a class project.

I would argue, too, that many of us have the characteristics to be and/or make a good leader. We have strong listening skills; we can articulate a plan of action. We can formulate a vision for others to follow. We motivate others. We have what it takes to, well, lead.

With all that said, many of us fail in being true leaders because we are missing the heart needed for leadership – integrity — and even the soul of necessary leadership – making unpopular decisions that are necessary to safeguard others or the two words to hold ourselves accountable, “I’m sorry.”

A true leader is honest and true to their core values. They make unpopular decisions not to harness power over others, but because it is the right thing to do and will benefit the majority.

They take a step back and look at the entire picture and they realize what most of us do not want to realize – that it isn’t always about us, but the welfare of others or fairness that extends to the majority rather than the minority of one.

When the New England Patriots star quarterback, Tom Brady, is accused of deflating footballs before the Superbowl game, most of the media finds the situation silly and a ridiculous story, which says more about how far our values have slipped than the jokes making the round on talk shows. Brady cheated. He got caught. Man up, and own up to it. Same goes to Tour de France Lance Armstrong, who, for years, vehemently denied taking steroids until he, too, was caught. Both of these athletic leaders are looked up to by countless young fans. Where is the integrity? The ownership? The apology?

Within the high school setting, many of us are called to task on things we prefer had never happened. We all make mistakes, but it is after the mistake or the bad choice when we have the chance to be that rare leader by admitting and accepting what we did was wrong, and calmly accepting the ramifications.

In April, a drone counter-terrorism air strike against al-Qaeda terrorists killed an American hostage, Warren Weinstein. Regardless of one’s political affiliation, President Obama publicly apologized to the hostage’s family.

The thing is: true leaders own up to their mistakes and take the consequences of their actions without any pushback, threat of legal action, or the necessity to slander others.

They are true to all the values and morals many of us think we have, but, when push comes to shove, we often do not possess. They exude grace under pressure.

True leaders accept their consequences , often, when they would rather deny or lie about their involvement. Yet, they are able to get up, hold their head high, take the punishment, and then they move on. They search their hearts to understand their dubious choices and as a leader, they learn. For this, they are far more wiser, stronger, and valuable to society as a whole.